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Sunday, December 18, 2011

Walang Sumpa, Meron lang Himala!

At Cha and Clarence's Wedding
December 29, 2008

Last Friday, Cha and I met with Dad for a dinner date he has been asking us for over a week now.

Had a hard time convincing my sister to agree to the dinner. It was just that Cha was getting really tired with all the emotional trauma my Dad had a knack of force-feeding us which I'd like to think is unintentional. 

Our kids Marti and Asti were happy they saw their grandfather after such a long time while the 3 of us exchanged the usual niceties. The dinner went on smoothly...well until it was time for desserts. As the kids went out of the restaurant to play, Dad sat nearer to me and Cha and started to tell why he wanted to see and talk to us and he summarized it in one sentence:

"Sinumpa tayong tatlo!" (The 3 of us are cursed!)

Cha and I looked at each other and we both laughed hysterically, with me almost hitting my head on the dinner table! What Dad told us was so incredulously absurd it became hilarious!

Dad went on that he believed that the 3 of us were cursed ever since Cha and I estranged ourselves from Dad's relatives almost 2 years ago. Why estranged? Because Dad's relatives meddled with his love life---all our lives actually as they always did---and the last straw was when his nieces posted our Dad's newest baby's (whom we had no idea actually existed) pictures in Facebook to show how much more clever they were than us, ignoring common decency (which was never common to them anyway). The incident almost caused my sister's and my nephew Asti's lives---after seeing the pictures, Cha got hospitalized due to hypertension and was in ICU for almost a week, on the brink of eclampsia. And yet after all of these, my Dad chose to side with his relatives. 

And as he claimed 2 years later, the 3 of us are now cursed. Cursed, because after that incident he lost his position in Makati City Hall which he held for more than 35 years and that his daughters are now so poor and I even converted to being a "Born Again". I almost hit my head again on the dining table, laughing so hard! I asked Dad who said we were poor and he revealed that his nieces reads my blog and they read there my stories about my finances, barely making it at times (unbelievably, Cha and I have lived gloriously free of them for the past 2 years and yet they were still hooked on us! tsk, tsk, tsk...we're not even movie stars :D). Dad went on saying the things I wrote on my blog about his family was what really "cursed" us. I wish to ask the readers to judge for themselves if anything in this post at my other blog is actually jinxing my family. If I get enough comments, my Dad would probably be convinced otherwise :D Funny how my Dad's relatives claims my blog as a curse while the rest of the world---well at least on the Feast's FB groups, my friends and my Mom's relatives--- considers the stories as testimonies to faith and hope. 

First, I told my Dad to thank his nieces for me for reading my blogs because they were making me rich. Then Cha told him there is no such thing as "sumpa" or curse because God NEVER ever punishes, only BLESSES. Also, I have not converted to being a "Born Again" (Dad thought I was because I would text him that Marti and I were attending prayer meetings every Thursday) although there was nothing wrong with that except my Mom would turn in her grave! We started telling him about the Makati Feast and how the Feast changed our lives and how we found a new family there. Cha and I declared that though our finances are not yet that established and we may be struggling now, we and our families have never been so happy! Why? Because we both learned that no matter how big our problems were, our GOD IS SO MUCH BIGGER! We have renewed our relationship with God and have seen Him as He really is: a Faithful Provider and a Loving and Merciful Father. And it is in this conviction that we lead our lives with hope and determination.

Dad persisted, "sinumpa talaga tayo. Wala na ako, ako na ngayon yung wala. Nung isang buwan, mga pamangkin ko napag-birthday ang Papa nila at niregaluhan pa ng flat TV (we're really cursed. I am no one now; now I'm the one who has nothing. The other month my nieces and nephews gave a birthday party to their father and even gifted him with a flat TV)."

Cha and I started to pity him. After all these years of being an accomplished and well-respected electrical engineer, chief electrical engineer of Makati City for 35 years, elected twice as President of the Institute of Integrated Electrical Engineers-NCR, electrical engineer contractor of Jollibee's first 50 stores, here was my Dad looking up to his nieces and nephews, some of whom he sent to school, who recently got jobs and whose father was just one of his employees in his contractor business. Dad never even realized that while he was looking up to these people, he was pitying his convinced-to-be-cursed daughters one of whom is a respected doctor in her field, married to a lawyer and the other an executive secretary-infopreneur-virtual assistant multitasker raising a son on her own. 

"Problema sa iyo Daddy, hindi mo kilala mga anak mo.  (problem with you Daddy, you don't know you're own daughters)" And in one sentence, Cha hit the mark. Couldn't believe that after all the hurts and betrayal my Dad's relatives gave us and our Mom, they had one victim left: our Dad. They couldn't get to us so they got to our Dad, now convincing him that the misfortunes in his life was caused by his daughters' alienating his relatives. If you had dementors or even emotional vampires for relatives, wouldn't you run as far away as you can, too? We told our Dad that we have forgiven his relatives but for him to ask us to reconcile with them is like asking God to reconcile with Lucifer. Okay, not in those words but we told him it was impossible. Cha advised him to remove himself from the influence of his relatives, the same way we did even if only for a brief time, to improve his outlook in life especially now that he was raising a new family. He has to stop listening to his relatives convincing him that we will never accept his new family (dementors, remember?). We both reassured Dad that we do acknowledge his new wife and child but we need time to adjust; soon we would be able embrace them into our hearts  as after all they are a part of him whom we will always love. 

I gave the final advice: "Dad, patawarin mo na ang sarili mo. Matagal ka na pinatawad nang Diyos at matagal ka na pinatawad ni Mommy. Kalimutan mo na nakaraan at mag-umpisa ka ulit lalo na may bago kang pamilya (Dad, forgive yourself. The Lord has forgiven you a long time ago and so did Mom. Forget the past and start anew especially now you have a new family). And in unison, Cha and I declared to our Dad:


Mom would have been so proud of all of us, I believe she is. We hugged and kissed each other and parted ways all filled with new hope and greater love for each other. It seemed like a miracle so with that I'm tweaking one of the most famous movie lines in Philippine cinema by Ms. Nora Aunor:

"WALANG SUMPA, MERON LANG HIMALA!" (There's no such thing as a curse, only miracles!)
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