Sisters

My sister Cha and I throughout the years

My sister Cha and I have been planning to spend some bonding time and when she discovered Mojito Night at T.G.I.Fridays we gave it a go last Saturday. 

Having our own families now and living apart, it was always a welcome treat to spend time with just each other but last Saturday was probably one of the most heart-warming and enlightening talks we've had in a very long time.

We didn't grow up really close, having opposite personalities despite resembling each other that oftentimes we were mistaken as twins. Cha was the physically strong one, tomboyish, outgoing and had lots of friends. I was always sickly being anemic, very shy and an introvert and would rather stay at home, drawing and sketching in my room or listening to the stories of the elders. Even in our relationships we were different: I only had one boyfriend back in high school while Cha had a string of them all the way to medical school. But going down memory lane over bottomless mojitos, Cha and I realized that it was in our differences  that we would find solace for each other, especially now that we were orphans, physically and emotionally---with Mom passing away 10 years ago and Dad remarrying and starting another family.

Talking about Mom, Cha told me about the time when she had to live at our paternal grandparents' house in Sampaloc, Manila since it was nearer to University of Sto. Tomas where she was taking up B.S. Biology for her pre-medicine studies. Everyday at around lunch time, she would call up Mom and ask what she cooked for lunch and whatever it was, Cha would always say "ang sarap naman (how delicious)". So Mommy would tell her that she would come over and bring her some of the food she cooked. I asked Cha why she had to ask Mom to bring her food when our grandparents were Kapampangans, known for their sumptuous cooking. She said, "Minsan, di pala yung pagkain na niluluto ang hinahanap mo kungdi yung kasama mo sa pagkain (sooner or later you realize it's not the food that you crave for, but who you're eating with)" We both fell quiet with what she said, feeling the heartache and longing for our Mom all over again. Another round of mojitos, please.

Next we talked about my day at the Kerygma Conference's stream for Solo Parents which I attended earlier. Was fascinated by the talk of Brother Hermie and Sister Reng Morelos who shared their experience on remarriage and step-family. Inevitably, Cha and I started discussing my non-existent love life, with her telling me that it's high time I started dating. Cha asked if I was feeling guilty, that I would feel like I wouldn't be a good mother to Marti if I started going out again. Of course not. It's not as if I haven't tried but the men who asks me out are either too young (read: just wants to play around) or too unavailable (read: married) and the last date I went on was with a guy who the following day was scheduled to ship off for the next 2 years! The worst part of that date was what the first thing the guy told me, "naku mukha kang mayaman (oh my, you look like you're rich)" Cha laughed so hard at that! Geez, if this guy is already telling me on the first date that I may be too much work for him, then he is not worth it. 

Then Cha shared something I never knew about her. She said that for many years, she would always make a   prayer/ wish on her birthday and asked God to give her a husband who is kind, patient, loving and who doesn't have the womanizing qualities of our Dad. And every time a relationship with a boyfriend would end, she would thank God for the experience because she knew it was another step towards her future husband. God, I was blown away by that. All along I thought my sister was shallow when it came to relationships when we were younger, going through several boyfriends while I was the wiser one, holding off while waiting for the right guy to come along. I never knew that Cha was on a spiritual journey with those failed relationships and years later she would be richly rewarded through her faith in God. 

As we went home that night, I thanked God for the rewarding day at the Kerygma Conference and the night spent with my sister Cha who has profoundly humbled me with her wisdom and faith.  

Looking forward to the next Mojito Night!