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| http://www.flickr.com/photos/mishism |
It has almost been 3 weeks now that I've been asked by my Dad and my Stepmom to be caretaker of their condo unit in Gramercy Residences and guardian of my 3-year old half-sister Gianna.
The experience was challenging with my sister crying almost everyday but I felt giddy, not having been trusted with such an enormous responsibility since I quit my job at the Consulate last year. I knew I could do this and was elated that my Dad even thought of me when he could have asked someone from among his dozens of relatives.
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| At Cha's clinic with our sister Gianna |
My oDesk career also started picking up again. Just a few months back, I was kinda frustrated due to the lack of new contracts and this was my only source of income. Now I have five with the latest one asking me just a few minutes ago if I wanted to work for them exclusively and they would increase my rate and hours! This, after working for them in less than a week. And I thought my probationary period of 3 months at the Consulate would be the shortest one I'll ever have :)
But I guess the biggest bonus I got for this week is being able to save--- well, I'd like to think of it that way--- at least two lives this week, both brought into mine by our solo parent caring group, the Makati Feast's MaSiPaG (Married Individuals and Single Parents Care Group).
As we guarantee confidentiality in our group meetings, I won't go into the details of their identities but would like to share with you how much their stories made me realize how much the Lord has transformed me in His Love and Grace.
The first one I met over two weeks ago, at the MaSiPaG's Monday session where she was one of the newest members who found us out through the internet and not through the Feast. I saw how distraught she was with the dissolution of her marriage, declaring how much she still loved her husband and an ache began to tug at my heart. She reminded me so much of myself back when my separation with Marti's Papa was still fresh. My story may have been different as it was I who broke the engagement, but I related to her pain when she said that her ex wouldn't even fight for her and her daughter anymore. I felt the same way in my past and it was one of the worse pain I felt in my life; up there with my Mom's passing and worse than my C-section. Why? Because the pain was not for me but for my son who wasn't even born yet and was already abandoned. But by God's Grace, He turned that pain into my strength and 13 years later, my and my son's lives are testament to the Lord's infallible Promise:
Although we didn't get to talk at the meeting, she was in my thoughts on my way home. I have to convince her that this too shall pass and I prayed to the Holy Spirit to use me to convince her of this. The following day, my birthday, I received the message and sent her an SMS with the verse "Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)". I felt the surprise and gratitude in her reply and I felt relieved that she didn't think I was being too personal with my message when we've only met the night before. I'm glad the Lord used me that day, dashing my usual timidity to strangers. I felt His Love for me that day, yes for me and not just for my new friend, because I knew He had listened to my prayer and had answered in a nanosecond. More so because it was my birthday and His gift was more precious than anything I've received that day. Yes, even compared to the exhilarating card I got from my hero Dr. Maya Angelou, the birthday tweet from E.L. James and my favorite treat from my sister Cha.
A few nights ago, I received an urgent message from her. I could tell she was more than depressed, worse she wanted to give up on life, because of the terrible longing for her husband. The week was difficult for me too as I was battling with my loneliness too, probably brought on by my new age...another year without a husband and thoughts about my children who should've been born a few years after my Marti.
Maybe it was a way for the Lord to hit two birds with one stone. I prayed, "Your words, Lord, not mine," and found hope and strength in the messages I sent my new friend. My last message, I asked her to join me at the Feast the following day, even promising to drive her home afterwards (thank God for my Dad's car). She just thanked me for my time but didn't say if she was going and I didn't want to push her at her delicate state. Later, Sister OP sent me a message that I was assigned for the bulletin on Sunday so decided not to go to Feast Legaspi anymore. Thursday night, I received an ecstatic text message from my new friend that she was so happy that I invited her to the Feast. She went! I felt ashamed that I didn't but she assured me that it was okay. I promise to be with her next week :)
Second person, was not even a member of the MaSiPaG but was a friend of one of ours. I really wasn't planning to stay after our meeting last Monday because I had a huge backlog with my oDesk work but with Gina and Pearl's prodding---both of whom I rarely see at the meetings--- and Jay's guilt trip, I relent and go with them to have coffee (which I had given up for how many months now) at McCafe Greenbelt 1. Through our conversations, I learned that Pearl had a friend who was so depressed with being jobless for a year and with having to take care of her old and sick parents, she was almost losing hope with life too. And that familiar ache tugged in my chest again, rehashing the pain I felt just a few months back when I quit my job, finances almost depleted and had no other income. But thanks to the Lord speaking to me through Tita Eva and Bro. Randy's pep talk, I was able to ride out that storm in my life. Sympathy winning over timidity again, I ask Pearl if we could meet her friend so I could talk to her about oDesk. To my surprise she agreed!
Three of us met Thursday afternoon at Coffee Bean near my Dad's condo so I could just walk. My baby sister was at it again and I had to slip out discreetly and go somewhere near where I could rush back. Our chitchat went smoothly, Pearl's friend was really appreciative that I'm taking time to help her out and I shared with her that I went through the same thing a few months back, that I had even thought of quitting the Makati Feast due to a crisis of faith. Surprise registered across her face, it turned out she was a Salcedo Feaster! I had no idea because I assumed she belonged to the same community (I think it's Victory) as Pearl was. It really felt like serendipity and now we had even more opportunities to meet up at the Makati Feasts. Exchanging e-mails and contact numbers and saying our goodbyes, I hug her tightly, knowing she has found hope and I felt beloved by the Lord again.
Last night at the Leadership Meeting of the Makati Feast, I felt extremely happy and excited at Bro. Randy's revelation of turning MaSiPaG into a ministry with it's growing reach and number. I knew then that the Lord has planned this all along, seeing His Hand weaving a tapestry of love in my life and adding cloth after cloth of other people's lives into mine. It's a picture of the meaning of my life which He had revealed to me recently and that is to be a "living witness" to His Love, Mercy and Generosity so that others could experience the same precious things in their lives.
As we guarantee confidentiality in our group meetings, I won't go into the details of their identities but would like to share with you how much their stories made me realize how much the Lord has transformed me in His Love and Grace.
The first one I met over two weeks ago, at the MaSiPaG's Monday session where she was one of the newest members who found us out through the internet and not through the Feast. I saw how distraught she was with the dissolution of her marriage, declaring how much she still loved her husband and an ache began to tug at my heart. She reminded me so much of myself back when my separation with Marti's Papa was still fresh. My story may have been different as it was I who broke the engagement, but I related to her pain when she said that her ex wouldn't even fight for her and her daughter anymore. I felt the same way in my past and it was one of the worse pain I felt in my life; up there with my Mom's passing and worse than my C-section. Why? Because the pain was not for me but for my son who wasn't even born yet and was already abandoned. But by God's Grace, He turned that pain into my strength and 13 years later, my and my son's lives are testament to the Lord's infallible Promise:
One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4
And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4
Although we didn't get to talk at the meeting, she was in my thoughts on my way home. I have to convince her that this too shall pass and I prayed to the Holy Spirit to use me to convince her of this. The following day, my birthday, I received the message and sent her an SMS with the verse "Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)". I felt the surprise and gratitude in her reply and I felt relieved that she didn't think I was being too personal with my message when we've only met the night before. I'm glad the Lord used me that day, dashing my usual timidity to strangers. I felt His Love for me that day, yes for me and not just for my new friend, because I knew He had listened to my prayer and had answered in a nanosecond. More so because it was my birthday and His gift was more precious than anything I've received that day. Yes, even compared to the exhilarating card I got from my hero Dr. Maya Angelou, the birthday tweet from E.L. James and my favorite treat from my sister Cha.
A few nights ago, I received an urgent message from her. I could tell she was more than depressed, worse she wanted to give up on life, because of the terrible longing for her husband. The week was difficult for me too as I was battling with my loneliness too, probably brought on by my new age...another year without a husband and thoughts about my children who should've been born a few years after my Marti.
Maybe it was a way for the Lord to hit two birds with one stone. I prayed, "Your words, Lord, not mine," and found hope and strength in the messages I sent my new friend. My last message, I asked her to join me at the Feast the following day, even promising to drive her home afterwards (thank God for my Dad's car). She just thanked me for my time but didn't say if she was going and I didn't want to push her at her delicate state. Later, Sister OP sent me a message that I was assigned for the bulletin on Sunday so decided not to go to Feast Legaspi anymore. Thursday night, I received an ecstatic text message from my new friend that she was so happy that I invited her to the Feast. She went! I felt ashamed that I didn't but she assured me that it was okay. I promise to be with her next week :)
Second person, was not even a member of the MaSiPaG but was a friend of one of ours. I really wasn't planning to stay after our meeting last Monday because I had a huge backlog with my oDesk work but with Gina and Pearl's prodding---both of whom I rarely see at the meetings--- and Jay's guilt trip, I relent and go with them to have coffee (which I had given up for how many months now) at McCafe Greenbelt 1. Through our conversations, I learned that Pearl had a friend who was so depressed with being jobless for a year and with having to take care of her old and sick parents, she was almost losing hope with life too. And that familiar ache tugged in my chest again, rehashing the pain I felt just a few months back when I quit my job, finances almost depleted and had no other income. But thanks to the Lord speaking to me through Tita Eva and Bro. Randy's pep talk, I was able to ride out that storm in my life. Sympathy winning over timidity again, I ask Pearl if we could meet her friend so I could talk to her about oDesk. To my surprise she agreed!
Three of us met Thursday afternoon at Coffee Bean near my Dad's condo so I could just walk. My baby sister was at it again and I had to slip out discreetly and go somewhere near where I could rush back. Our chitchat went smoothly, Pearl's friend was really appreciative that I'm taking time to help her out and I shared with her that I went through the same thing a few months back, that I had even thought of quitting the Makati Feast due to a crisis of faith. Surprise registered across her face, it turned out she was a Salcedo Feaster! I had no idea because I assumed she belonged to the same community (I think it's Victory) as Pearl was. It really felt like serendipity and now we had even more opportunities to meet up at the Makati Feasts. Exchanging e-mails and contact numbers and saying our goodbyes, I hug her tightly, knowing she has found hope and I felt beloved by the Lord again.
Last night at the Leadership Meeting of the Makati Feast, I felt extremely happy and excited at Bro. Randy's revelation of turning MaSiPaG into a ministry with it's growing reach and number. I knew then that the Lord has planned this all along, seeing His Hand weaving a tapestry of love in my life and adding cloth after cloth of other people's lives into mine. It's a picture of the meaning of my life which He had revealed to me recently and that is to be a "living witness" to His Love, Mercy and Generosity so that others could experience the same precious things in their lives.
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